you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Randomize
