Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
