I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
