Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
