hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize