Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
