covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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