I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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