i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
operation have a gay friend backfired
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
