Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
