how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Randomize
