Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Randomize
