she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
