I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
