how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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