I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize
