I have demons in me.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
