Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
