i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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