I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
