When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
No...this little piggys going to the bar
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
