a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
