Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
