where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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