thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
