i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
