Taylor Swift is so right about you.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
