too bad you live with your parents still
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize