We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
