I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
