you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
