He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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