You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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