At least make sure they are 18
Why
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
