Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
