Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
