i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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