i don't like sucking hair
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
