The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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