Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
