I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
