How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
