When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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