drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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