Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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