I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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