Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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