Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
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