turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
My vagina just clenched in fear
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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