I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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